As I sat on our old wooden dining table, i was staring at him while he was eating his dinner. He was my so called "best friend". I stared at his short, curly hair, and wished he could passed me his fried drumstick. But he didn't notice me like that, and I knew it.
After dinner, he walked up to me and asked my help to make some hot milo for him and i did it. He said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on my cheek. I wanted to tell him that i will be there when he needs me but I'm just too shy and I don't know why.
11 years old
The phone rang. On the other end, it was him. He was in tears, mumbling on and on about how his classmates had treated him badly. He asked me to come over to company him at school because he didn't want to be alone, but i couldn't so i promised to company him when i get back. As I sat next to him on the sofa, I stared at his soft eyes, wishing i could do something to make him happy. After 2 hours, one Power Rangers cartoon, and three bags of chips, he decided to go to sleep. He looked at me, said "thanks". I wanted to tell him that i will be there when he needs me but I'm just too shy and I don't know why.
17 years old
The day before I left for my further study, he came to me and told me a lot about his first crush. He couldn't open his mouth to say "hi" to the girl he admired. He said he just can staring at her in the class. He stared her long, silky hair, and wished she was belongs to him. When i looked at his eyes and the way he expressed the feelings, i can only smile and realized that he will never be mine only, he is growing up and need to find the person he loves.I wanted to tell him that i will be there when he needs me but I'm just too shy and I don't know why.
A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of my house. That guy is getting engaged now. I watched him say "I do" and drive off to his new life, engaged to another girl. I wanted him to be my "best friend" forever, but thats impossible, he loves her and she is his first crush. I am very happy for him and he managed to sneaked a couple of minutes of his important day just to say "Thank you" to me which i do not know what was that for but deep in my heart, i was so happy to heard that from his mouth. At that time, I can only prayed for his happiness and i can't wait to see him with the girl that he loves so much, walking down the aisle of the church where he is going to get married. I wanted to tell him that i will be there when he needs me but I'm just too shy and I don't know why.
Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a guy who used to be my "best friend". Everybody cried for the sudden lost, i couldn't stop my tears. He didn't even say goodbye to me and he just gone forever. I suddenly felt this world is so empty. At the service, the fiancée read his life story. This is what she read: He loves the family so much and he really grateful to have a sister who is not just a sister but a "best friend" that he could say anything he wants, make jokes and laughs. Even though she likes to scold him but he never had hard feeling about that instead he felt grateful to have somebody who will scold him when he is doing something wrong. But he was so sad because when she got problems, she just kept it herself. He wanted to tell her that he will be there when she needs him but he was just too shy and he didn't know why..........I thought to my self, and I cried. "I am sorry my little brother..you are my best friend forever.."
